This is a rush transcript of “Gutfeld” on October 21, 2021. This copy may not be in its final form and may be updated.
GREG GUTFELD, FOX NEWS HOST: Happy Thursday, everyone. And boys at a happy one because I almost made it through the week without being stabbed or shot. Although twice security staff, Dana Perino just in time. But all of us here in this studio have something in common. We aren’t dead, at least yet. Because in New York City not getting assaulted is akin to winning the lottery. It’s a violent city right now. This morning, I saw a rat with a black guy.
It’s a funny image, not even a real joke. But hey, murders spiked big time jumping from 319 in 2019 to 500 in 2020. Now we shy away from numbers around here because Kat hates math. But change that vowel to an E. That’s another story.
KAT TIMPF, FOX NEWS CONTRIBUTOR: Oh, I spoke math, right, OK.
GUTFELD: That job by the way, was the largest since national record keeping began in 1960. That was the year the mob finally stopped killing all the record keepers. So yes, we may not be number one anymore in math or science, but check out how we kill each other. Where’s our gold medal in that? We got to host the Olympic Games so we can add competitive drive-bys as a new sports.
But as the media quickly points out all the time, if you move a murder from the statistics, crime has dropped. Well, that’s a relief. So hey, Honey, did you here this year? You’re less likely to get robbed. Why don’t you answer me? Oh, wow, you’ve been murdered. But at least you weren’t robbed. Now let me move your body before I get arrested for littering. Maybe I’m crazy. But if murder nearly doubles while lesser stuff is down, I’m not throwing a parade.
Mainly because no one will show up since they’ve all been murdered. So the crime wave (INAUDIBLE) NYC either, Chicago had 771 murders last year compared to 500 the previous year. L.A. went from 258 to 351. That’s why these cities are hemorrhaging residents because the residents are hemorrhaging. Murders have jumped 10 percent from 2020 in 87 cities according to The New York Times.
And speaking of murder, you know what killed the Times to admit that. Still, the Times is in full denial. To them it has nothing to do with defunding and marginalizing law enforcement while cheering on the destruction of cities or releasing repeat violent offenders onto the streets which they have essentially decriminalizing crime. No, no, no, it’s not that. The quota community organizer in the peace, “People are desperate, and they don’t have a lot of options. So they turn to violence as a way to solve things.”
So is that a desperate person’s only option? You know, look for a job or kill someone. Congratulations, media. You’ve dressed the city in a short skirt and said she was asking for it. If you don’t see the criminal as the perpetrator, but as a victim, you happily excuse yourself from punishing the perp. However, the media would surely change their minds if these crimes are being committed by Trump supporters.
So what is New York City doing while citizens are picked off like clay pigeons at a skeet shoot? While the Board of Health has declared racism a public health crisis? Not murder, not mental illness, not drug abuse, not pumpkin spice lattes. But racism. Those victims pushed onto the subway tracks I bet there’ll be so relieved. So they passed a resolution declaring that COVID has worsened the suffering among communities of color.
Now if the referring to rest homes, they might be right. Black, white, brown racism didn’t kill them though. The carelessness and stupidity of our politicians did. One state senator, Brad Hoylman said we need an urgent call to action. We can no longer ignore as a government or society. Yes, because we’ve been ignoring racism. Sorry, where’s this idiot been? The only place where racism isn’t being discussed ad nauseam is under the sea.
And even there, the great white shark gets a bad rap. It’s true. This resolution came six months after the inept CDC declared racism a serious public health threat. And now they’ve created a mayoral racial justice commission. Who’s going to be in charge of it? The mayor’s wife? No.
Our mayor is stupid. (INAUDIBLE) but his wife’s worse. She ran the mental health program that made 800 million bucks taxpayer money disappear.
As a result, what’s happening on our streets looks like the trailer for the sequel to One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest. It’s crazy. So is racism a public health crisis? Let’s ask the angry black male.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
TYRUS, FOX NATION HOST: Hey, Gutfeld. Sorry. Just not going to be in this week really under the weather or under your oppression. I’m sorry, I got the — I got the racism really bad this week (INAUDIBLE) oh man (INAUDIBLE) oh.
Sorry, you guys should probably go. Oh, but, you know, I mean, I guess the good news devil — sorry, is that, you know, it’s not me personally. It’s an illness (INAUDIBLE) oh.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
GUTFELD: Maybe it’s true. Racism is a public health crisis. If you’re a racist. If you think being a racist offers you any advantage in life, then you’re worse than a racist. You’re Joy Reid. The quickest way to end your life just be a racist. I would have added being caught whacking off on a work Zoom call. But CNN proved me wrong. But the left maintains you can be guilty of racism without any proof at all.
It’s like dunking witches. If they float, they’re guilty. But if they’re innocent, they drown. And if they get hepatitis, the water is definitely from Kat’s hot tub. You call systemic or unconscious racism, no matter what you call it. It’s designed to get around your denial of being a bigot. Your blood runs red, white and racist, except for the accusers who were somehow born without that evil gene. So is racism a problem? Sure.
But it didn’t rape that woman on the train in Philly while people filmed it. It didn’t kill that Filipino nurse in Times Square two weeks ago. Racism didn’t send that other Asian woman down a flight of subway stairs to her death. Racism didn’t push people in front of trains, racism didn’t force closures of stores that can no longer keep up with retail theft. Or wait. Maybe racism is behind this.
Because what else could be fueling that denial of rising homicide rates? That’s killing so many blacks? The denial exposes the underlying message from the white elite activist class. What do you expect from these people? That’s the racism and it’s a true public health crisis seriously, if COVID revealed anything, it’s that living under Democrat leadership is the most dangerous comorbidity one could have?
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Period.
GUTFELD: Let’s welcome tonight’s guests. He’s a hockey fan who’s not afraid to ask (INAUDIBLE) Vice President of public relations for ZLabs, Chris Barron. The brilliant economist always brings a high interest rate. Financial Analyst Heather Zumarraga. He’s birth aboard T.V. successes then Kris Jenner, T.V. writer and producer Rob Long. And she’s the only person that Olive Guardian said wasn’t family. Fox News Contributor Kat Timpf.
Got a lot of fans there, Kat. They’re obviously drunk. Rob, when you see stuff like this, do you wonder how can this country survive when we — when lawlessness is now somehow government approved and its citizens get target by our very own agencies?
ROB LONG, T.V. WRITER AND PRODUCER: Yes. Except that, you know, the good news is that the New York Mayor is on his way out. And the guy on his way in is, you know, went around the boroughs of Manhattan — boroughs of New York City. So what do you guys want in places like Brooklyn and Queens in the Bronx, and they said, we want more cops. And he said, OK.
LONG: He ran on that and he won and he’s going to win probably, you know, it’s Democratic city. It’s a — he’s a Democratic candidate.
LONG: Probably going to win. And so it is correcting itself a little bit. I mean, what I’m most worried about I think is more freaky to me is that a lot of these crimes, a lot of these murders in New York City anyway are committed by insane people on the street. And that is a public health crisis.
GUTFELD: Yes. Oh no, absolutely. If you drive up any avenue to like I do every day to work because I’m a man of the people.
TIMPF: You don’t drive.
GUTFELD: My driver, is it — is it —
TIMPF: You do not drive.
GUTFELD: My driver drives me. Can you see it through the — through the —
GUTFELD: And I always tell the driver not to speak to me or look at me so I can capture. But I mean, you go up the street. There are people lying face down on the ground, and you can’t do anything. They’re insane, Heather. To you, you are a business expert. How is this affecting, like, businesses in any time — when — this is a nationwide issue. There are businesses that aren’t coming back from COVID. And then when they come back, they deal with crime.
HEATHER ZUMARRAGA, FINANCIAL ANALYST: Right. So, the businesses that did succeed, especially small businesses, through the pandemic, now they’re having to deal with the issue of when they call the police if someone’s robbing the store, nobody shows up on time.
ZUMARRAGA: So they have to shut down because they’re losing a lot of revenue due to all this — due to all the theft.
ZUMARRAGA: And I just think when the murder increase was the highest year over year since the 60s, 77 percent of those were caused by firearms. So you will hear the Democrats blame guns. We’ll say guns are the problem, but it’s not. It’s defunding the police. There’s no surprise that surging violence in cities of Minneapolis and Portland in New York and L.A. are all areas where they reduce the police budgets.
I mean, that’s no coincidence. So law enforcement risked their lives every day to save us and I think they deserve a lot more respect.
GUTFELD: Yes. What —
GUTFELD: Chris, is it time to start to funding things that Democrats like?
CHRIS BARRON, VICE PRESIDENT OF PUBLIC RELATIONS, ZLAB: Oh, yes. Absolutely.
GUTFELD: Like the arts?
BARRON: Yes. Well, no, so here’s actually what the saddest thing is, is that the left-wing activists who say that, like there’s all this desperation in the inner cities, they’re absolutely correct. Unfortunately, the left doesn’t have any policy solutions.
BARRON: So what they offer up is this empty rhetoric. It’s, you know, it’s racism, it’s bigotry, it’s homophobia. They have no actual agenda to get people off the streets. To get people working, to give people opportunity and that’s what this is all about. It is the complete — the emperor has no clothes here. All they have is empty rhetoric. And that’s why — that’s why we just continue to see it over and over again.
GUTFELD: Literally when you’re on the streets in New York, sometimes the Emperor’s —
GUTFELD: — close. You know what though, to your point, that — it’s — the problems that the left concentrate on, you can concentrate on in times of luxury, right? The Republicans coming to power, they build an economy then the Democrats would come in and talk about gender diversity. But now we’re in chaos. And they’re still talking about like things about like pronouns while everybody’s suffering. If — we need to get the adults back in the room, Kat. What do you say?
TIMPF: It depends on which adults.
TIMPF: And which room. Like I want more cops on the street. For sure, do I want them, you know, searching my apartment? Not necessarily.
GUTFELD: Oh, god knows (INAUDIBLE)
TIMPF: But it’s — everybody sees it, right? Like — I mean, even — just yesterday there was a guy passed out right across the sidewalk by my apartment. They look kind of like Kilmeade. And we were concerned — we were like — as we were walking the dog like, is he dead? We don’t know what kind of walk and he was like, oh no, I’m just taking a nap. It’s like I have taken naps before
TIMPF: You don’t do it like that.
GUTFELD: Yes. It is a — the broken windows theory has been — has been debunked, but we’re finding that it was wrongly debunked that if you allow certain things like that happen it only gets worse.
TIMPF: I allowed it. We — I invited him over.
GUTFELD: Excellent. All right. Up next. Were their demands addressed at their sparsely attended protests?
GUTFELD: Dave Chappelle being funny, had their eyes crying and their noses runny. His fans showed up and they were brave, telling trans protesters we like Dave. This week transgender rights activists and Dave Chappelle fans class outside Netflix’s California offices. Ironically, the little rendezvous was more entertaining than most things found on Netflix. Some of their employees staged a walkout to protest Chappelle’s last special, arguing that his jokes harm the trans community and could incite violence.
They didn’t mention that they would be the ones inciting violence but hey, here’s what some had to say.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Identity, expression and sexuality are three completely different things. Your jokes are promoting hateful and discriminatory behavior and conversation. And that is what hurts us.
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: A person does not need to produce, deliver a birth a child to be a woman. That goes for any woman, trans or (INAUDIBLE)
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: We’re just here to support jokes, man. Jokes. That’s what makes this country great. Free speech.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
GUTFELD: An American hero. Of course, they disagreed and watch as he has a sign destroyed.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Why are you breaking my sign? Why are you breaking my sign? (BLEEP) We don’t have free speech (INAUDIBLE)
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: He’s got to love him. He’s got to love him.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
GUTFELD: So they destroyed a sign that said We Like Dave. Talk about a horrible violent message for some employees of issue to list the demands including attaching a disclaimer to Chappelle special which would say that it contains transphobic language, misogyny, homophobia and of course hate speech. Fine. But then I’d like their protest to be labeled doll, racist and full of wet blankets.
And really if they find the jokes so bad why don’t they jump into the arena and come up with better ones? That’s what I did with late night hosts and clearly it is really working out. Babe me, babe me and the applause. All right. You know, this reminds all of us and me how awesome free speech really is. Check out this protest outside our offices earlier today.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Hey, hey, whoa, whoa, Brian Kilmeade has got to go. Hey, hey, whoa, whoa, Brian Kilmeade has got to go. Hey, hey, whoa, whoa, Brian Kilmeade has got to go. Hey, hey, whoa, whoa, Brian Kilmeade has got to go. Hey, hey, whoa, whoa.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
GUTFELD: Those are my people. You know, I can’t help when I was — when I was talking about this. I could see Chris Barron. Your face turning beet red. Angry — you’re an angry gay male.
BARRON: I am, I am. Look, by the way. OK. Two things one, I guess the moment of like racial like reckoning for the left is over. It’s over. There’s nothing but lily white liberals out there yelling and screaming about shutting down the rights of a black man to actually do his job, tell jokes, and make money. So I guess that’s over. That’s done.
BARRON: That’s done. Sacrifice to the altars of, you know, the transgender community. Secondly, I assume no one there actually watched the Chappelle Special.
GUTFELD: Of course.
BARRON: He’s spent 15 minutes talking about a good friend of his who was trans, who took her own life and how — like important she was in his life. And these people out there are yelling and — proving his point all along these folks. They’re not watching the Special.
BARRON: They’re picking up the talking points. They’re catching it off of left-wing media. They don’t care about Dave Chappelle. They don’t care about comedy. They care about protecting this new gender B.S. crap.
GUTFELD: Yes. You know, before that — before that woman committed suicide who was Chappelle’s friend, she had been hounded for being a fan of his.
GUTFELD: By the transgender community. I’m not going to the — it’s a causation but there’s a correlation, Kat, that’s a little science for you. When you write —
TIMPF: I can’t do science, I’m a woman. Continue.
GUTFELD: OK. Are you a woman tonight?
TIMPF: Yes. I’ve been a woman so far the entire time I’ve been alive. And I plan to stick with it.
GUTFELD: All right. Good for you. You’re doing a good job.
TIMPF: Yes. Thank you.
GUTFELD: You’re doing a good job.
TIMPF: Thank you.
GUTFELD: Go ahead.
TIMPF: I just think that it’s really almost sad that these people have nothing better to do than go out and protest a problem that they created in their own head. Because that sign saying Trans Lives Matter. Like, when did Chappelle say that they don’t?
TIMPF: He never — he never said that they don’t. I mean, believing that Trans Lives Matter, and believing that a comedian should be able to tell jokes, like not only are they not, you know, not mutually exclusive, they’re not even related.
GUTFELD: Yes, no —
TIMPF: They’re not even related things. It’s truly crazy. And I don’t think people acknowledge that enough.
GUTFELD: You know, though, if you change the channel, which most people do, then you can’t protest. So it’s like they don’t — if they turn it on, they can turn it off, so they won’t turn it on. So they can’t turn it off. And then they could go and scream and yell.
TIMPF: What do they think that he said?
GUTFELD: Yes, exactly.
TIMPF: Clearly not what he actually said.
GUTFELD: I mean, he was far worse to a few other groups and some specific people, Heather. What drives me crazy about this is the CEO apologized because people were clearly in pain. And it’s like, what are they in pain from? A withering bone disease, cancer, a brain tumor? When people talk about being in pain over something that is like entertainment. It should upset and offend anybody suffering from a real malady.
ZUMARRAGA: Right. Right.
GUTFELD: Thank you. That wasn’t a question. Sorry.
ZUMARRAGA: No, no, I’ve got you. I mean, Netflix is a huge company. I’m thinking of it from a business perspective. And so he’s — Netflix CEO and the head of their programming is saying we have to protect our brand and therefore they’re putting out a statement. But I’m pretty sure originally, they were in favor of the show, they approved of the show, and that’s why it was released.
ZUMARRAGA: But due to all the backlash, they’re trying to protect the business. I get it. But look, cancel culture is very scary. Like you said, if you don’t like it, just change the channel. In comedy, nothing should be off limits. That’s why it’s comedy. But if you are cancelled, you’re done. I mean, on the way walking over here, there was a man behind me, and they were all walking in a line as part of a group and I heard him say, I don’t want to be part of this group, you know, because — then he asked to walk in the group and they can’t get around people move through Time Square.
And it occurred to me that there’s no individual thought anymore on the left. And once you’re branded, I think of Nicki Minaj, who said she didn’t want to take the vaccine. She didn’t say that the vaccine was bad and don’t get it. She said she may not want to take it herself. I think of Kanye West and his support of President Trump. He was also banned. So if they, meaning the radical left, think you’re part of their group.
And you step out of — outside of the group with some individual thought, you are done. You were finished and banned. You’re not allowed to have your own thoughts.
GUTFELD: Yes, you know, it was interesting, too when you look at the protests, it seems like there was more media there than protesters, Rob. Although might be unclear to many people. You spent most of your career in comedy.
LONG: Yes, yes, I know. It’s weird, isn’t it?
LONG: I find that shocking.
GUTFELD: This is alarming.
LONG: Well, look, I think it is a problem. Well, first of all, I mean, to be fair, like Chappelle said, fine, Nicki Minaj is going to be fine. Kanye West is going to be fine.
LONG: We shouldn’t worry. But look like — and I heard like, there were some Netflix employees who walked out. But a lot of those Netflix employees are working from home. So they really kind of walked out of the house, like just on the sidewalk, turned around and shake their fist at your front door or something. The problem is that — I mean, I think it’s actually counterproductive for the group.
LONG: What Chappelle does is not tell jokes. He tells stories.
GUTFELD: Right. That’s true.
LONG: — a compelling 15-minute story about this woman who was a friend of his and that if you are in favor of trans rights and some trans acceptance that is probably the most useful and positive story that can be told.
LONG: And a lot of people heard it. And it’s just amazing to me that they could take what is in fact a win and turn it turn it into something that they’re pissed about. It’s just so bizarre to me. It’s like neurotic, it’s like — it’s like a kind of a — it’s a — it is a form of mental illness.
GUTFELD: Yes, it just — it drives me crazy because if you have — if you’re suffering from actual pain and you see somebody kind of basically culturally appropriate pain pisses me off, you know. Because right now I have heartburn.
GUTFELD: I am the real — I am the real victim here.
LONG: You are.
GUTFELD: I’ve been — I’ve been struggling with GERD for almost a month now.
LONG: You are so courageous.
GUTFELD: I’m, you know, I’m fighting the — I’m fighting the battle.
GUTFELD: I’m fighting the battle.
LONG: You’re a heartburn hero.
GUTFELD: It is inspiring. If you have GERD at home, I am your GERD spirit animal.
LONG: You’re a GERD hero.
GUTFELD: Up next. The Biden ministration is willing to bet that parents are the biggest threat.
GUTFELD: As school boards move toward the left, concerned parents give them an F. Between mask mandates, Critical Race Theory being labeled domestic terrorists and gender policies more confusing than Ru Paul buying drinks at Ladies Night. Parents have a lot to be pissed off about.
But Biden’s top cop, Attorney General Merrick Garland, is leading the war against mom and dad. He’s got more issues with parents than Britney Spears. Republican lawmakers grilled him over his horrid memo directing federal law enforcement to review threats against school board members. Garland tried to clarify but dug a deeper hole.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
REP. JIM JORDAN (R-OH): First sentence of your memo, the very first sentence you said in recent months, there’s been a disturbing spike in harassment intimidation, threats of violence.
MERRICK GARLAND, U.S. ATTORNEY GENERAL: Yes.
JORDAN: When did you first review the data showing this so-called disturbing uptick?
GARLAND: So, I read the letter, and we have been seeing over time threat —
JORDAN: Whoa, whoa, whoa — I didn’t ask you — so, you read the letter. That’s, that’s your source? Is there’s some study, some efforts some investigation, someone did that said there’s been a disturbing uptick or you just take the words of the National School Board Association?
GARLAND: Well, the National School Board Association, which represents thousands of school boards and school board members says that there are these kinds of threats.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
GUTFELD: So, let’s target parents based on the School Board Association letter demanding that he target parents. This isn’t based on any actual data, no facts, no stats, no cases, just a letter. That’s pretty scary. And if you’re scared, you should be. When a group of people can write a letter to the Attorney General demanding you get targeted, and he agrees that’s some seriously bad (BLEEP). I might, I might try that on my neighbor who keeps playing Coldplay. I hate Coldplay.
Earlier this week, parents in Michigan and Virginia filed a lawsuit against Garland accusing him of trying to criminalize free speech. And if that’s not enough, the CDC now says schools should keep mask mandates even if the kids are vaccinated. So, Mr. President, what’s up with this war on parents?
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
TOM SHILLUE, COMEDIAN: Look, I don’t know what these parents are so upset about. Let the schools do the teaching, all right. You’re not an expert in how to raise your kids. Look, they teach the four Rs in school: reading, writing, and arithmetic, vaccines. The five Rs.
And, you know, the song, “School Days, School Days, Dear Old Golden Rule Days.” What’s the golden rule? Wear a mask?
(END VIDEO CLIP)
GUTFELD: Heather, I was just saying, we never, we don’t have a war on Christmas anymore. We need a new war. And I think they just delivered one. It’s the war on parents. And the parents have to, have to at some point galvanize because their kids are like the most important thing. I don’t understand it. But you know — you have kids.
HEATHER ZUMARRAGA, FOX NEWS BUSINESS CONTRIBUTOR: I’m one — yes, I’m one of those moms and, and I think the world of my daughter, everyone thinks that their kids are the best in the world. Of course, we’re all biased as parents. But you’re right, this is a big push to take away power from parents and shout out to all those that are speaking up against this. I mean, for example, Critical Race Theory is divisive, t’s un-American, it’s very destructive. And I think the federal government should stay out of it.
You leave it up to the states. In that way, you, you keep the authority with the parents where if you don’t want your child to go to that school, they can go to a different school. And here’s where it’s really hurting Democrats in the polls, you look at in Virginia, Terry McAuliffe, his, his poll numbers are tanking. He said that parents should have no role in, in parenting their child. And even Democrats aren’t, aren’t, aren’t voting for him. The school is not the ultimate authority — it’s the parent, whether you have a child or not.
ROB LONG, WRITER: Yes.
GUTFELD: Rob, this president was supposed to unite a country, but he is — he’s uniting the country against Joe Biden. I mean —
LONG: That’s, that’s united. I don’t know what you’re —
GUTFELD: He didn’t tell us how he was going to do it.
LONG: First of all, you know, you like Coldplay?
GUTFELD: No, I don’t.
LONG: All right.
GUTFELD: Ever since he heard porn, Gwyneth Paltrow —
LONG: Right. Right.
GUTFELD: Feelings broke her heart.
LONG: But I would say this is that the origin the problem is, is that the parents are finding out what’s going on in schools.
LONG: So, the minute they find out what’s going on in schools, the minute they actually look, watch or read —
ZUMARRAGA: Because of Zoom at home.
LONG: Yes, a school board meeting, they’re like, Wait, what? Wait, that what? So, the problem isn’t for these guys, isn’t that the parents are protests, the problems, the parents now know what’s happening?
LONG: And you — it’s hard to it’s hard to shut somebody up once they know.
LONG: Just what you’re doing in their name.
GUTFELD: Exactly. You know, Kat, they — no one seemed to mind when people were accosting people at brunch, or chasing down, you know, people come and leaving restaurants or going to the theater. But now, if you dare cross the school board.
KAT TIMPF, FOX NEWS CONTRIBUTOR: Yes, and I just — all of them say follow the science quite a bit for people who don’t have science. Like there was a letter, that’s crazy, but it’s, it’s you know, par for the course. It’s — where’s the science that says, you know, you don’t need to wear a mask if you’re a year and 11 months and three weeks old, but once you hit 2 years old, you better put that mask on, or else your whole family is murder family.
TIMPF: They say that.
GUTFELD: They do.
GUTFELD: They do. You know, Chris, it’s amazing to see the Attorney General, make his decisions based on stuff I see on TV and this letter. This is — he’s not treating this seriously.
CHRIS BARRON, ZLABS VICE PRESIDENT FOR PUBLIC RELATIONS: No, it’s and by the way, so my husband’s public schoolteachers —
GUTFELD: You have a husband?
BARRON: I know, what? I’m a guy. My husband’s a public-school teacher in Frederick County, Virginia.
BARRON: And he has said for years and years that the most important thing in determining success or failure for children is involvement of the parents, that when he has parent-teacher conferences with failing students, guess what? Parents never show up.
BARRON: The A-plus students, the parents are always — we ought to be encouraging parents to take a role in their children — know what’s going on there. So, instead, we’ve got the federal government threatening to roll out the Patriot Act against parents who are concerned, that is absolutely ridiculous.
GUTFELD: It’s insane. But having said that, it gives us so much great content. All right, before we go, a quick reminder, come see me on my book tour. I’ll be in Birmingham, Alabama next month, and lovely Newark, New Jersey in December. To get info — he laughed — it is beautiful — GGutfel.com. Coming up, TV’s top 100 list in the show they clearly miss.
GUTFELD: So, what’s your favorite show in which ones really blow? The BBC has released its list of 100 Greatest TV series of the 21st century. Somehow, we just missed the cut off. Must have been those episodes with Kilmeade dragging us down, talk about dead weight. But they really, they must really believe climate change is take, taking us all out by 2030 because we’re barely a fifth of the way through this century, and they’re doing this list.
The network polled film critics, academics, and TV insiders from all around the world. Unfortunately, people who weren’t dorks were uninterested in participating. Wow. Anyway, according to the experts, the number one show over the past 20 years is “The Wire,” not bad, followed by “Madman,” “Breaking Bad,” “Fleabag,” and “Game of Thrones.” “The Big Bang Theory” came in at number 56 so they also pulled people with severe head injuries.
Unfortunately, they left out one of my favorite sitcoms, let’s play the intro. You’re going to love it.
Not on the list, Kat, what it would be on your list. What’s number one for you?
TIMPF: It depends what kind of mood I’m in, what kind of day I’ve had.
GUTFELD: Here we go.
TIMPF: But I will. I’m not going to go anywhere further with that, OK. You wish I would share more. Like, “It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia,” was really low on the list which was wrong because that’s a brilliant, amazing, hilarious show. But “BoJack Horseman” was up at the top and I love that show, but it’s very subjective because not everyone’s going to like that show because not everybody you know has that much mental disturbance going on.
GUTFELD: It’s a great show. It is a great — one of the best written shows. They see where they go to the movie premiere “Underwater,” made my heart move.
GUTFELD: Rob, you are a TV vet, producer of “Cheers,” no less, and no more.
LONG: And no more. Which is why my favorite show of the 21st century are “Cheers” reruns.
ZUMARRAGA: My mom, too.
GUTFELD: What is —
LONG: But to be fair, I also am big fan of the GUTFELD show before it got really bad.
GUTFELD: Right, when we started having Rob Long on. Is there a part? Is there a favorite era of “Cheers” like —
LONG: Actually, you know, I was in the second part of it. So — but I think the first part, it was really great. I think it was pretty, there’s some great, great T.V. show, TV episodes.
GUTFELD: Heather, I’ll go to you last. Chris —
BARRON: I’m Chris.
GUTFELD: Yes. Pick your show.
BARRON: “Arrested Development.” “Arrested Development,” way, way, way too low on the list. And by the way, another one that I don’t think made the list — “Happy Endings.” “Happy Endings” was an amazingly good show, consistently funny.
GUTFELD: I only know them; I only know the practice. Heather.
ZUMARRAGA: I don’t watch a whole lot of TV, only your show. And I was wondering where “Cheers” was but I understand it’s 21st century so we can watch the reruns. But if I had to pick two: “Mad Men” and “Curb Your Enthusiasm,” that’s about the only two I’ve seen on that list.
GUTFELD: I will urge people to seek out this show called “Peep Show,” it’s a British show. Fantastic.
GUTFELD: They — now the guy’s got famous making succession, right? Same do.
LONG: Right. Right.
GUTFELD: Yes, yes, but it’s the — it’s the bit, it’s all based that all human beings are basically basket cases. Doesn’t matter politically, gender, whatever — we’re all weird. Very good. And “The British Office,” probably one of the best shows ever made. That’s it. All right. Up next, the pageant said they weren’t that cute. So, the sore losers file suit.
GUTFELD: The pageant told them no, not you. So, they decided to sue three women, aren’t they all? Who tried and failed to be crowned Miss France, teamed up with a feminist group to sue the pageant they allege they were discriminated against based on their appearance? Now, I could be wrong but isn’t that the entire beauty pageant model? The pageant does have strict rules; however, contestants have to be at least five-foot-five, looks like I’m out. Got to be single and representative of beauty. Looks like I’m mostly back in. They’ve also forbidden from gaining weight, changing their hair and getting any tattoos or piercings other than in their ears. Sorry, Kat.
Although, they’re still free to collaborate with any Germans, because they’re French. But hey, just because it was called a beauty contest, it’s not like that meant these women should expect to be judged on their looks. And really, isn’t everyone beautiful in their own way. At least that’s what ugly people tell me. Chris, does this sound like a setup? They joined the pageant and then sued? A total setup.
BARRON: Of course, it completely sounds like a setup. I also think it’s funny that we’ve got all these people out there that are saying that like yes, you can absolutely be fired for not getting the vaccine, vaccine. You can be denied access to grocery stores, to restaurants, but the same people are like, I can’t be judging in a beauty pageant based on my actual looks.
BARRON: I mean, like —
GUTFELD: What do we judge you on, your internal organs?
BARRON: Right? Like —
GUTFELD: Open up! Slice him open.
TIMPF: I would watch — I’d watch that pageant.
GUTFELD: The interior beauty pageants, Rob. You are a producer.
LONG: I’m in.
GUTFELD: You’re a producer. Can you imagine Dr. Michael (INAUDIBLE) there to do the autopsy?
GUTFELD: But they’re not dead
LONG: They’re not dead.
GUTFELD: They’re not dead.
LONG: All done in one of those operating theatres.
GUTFELD: Yes. I always wanted to go to one of those.
LONG: Yes, I think that there’s a reason why they won’t let you in.
GUTFELD: Sometimes I just think some things are free.
LONG: I know this is kind of funny but yet scary thing is this is France.
LONG: France, where like they smoke —
LONG: And they — the kids drink.
LONG: And they go yes you know it’s not so much you know, she’s not attractive. You know, that’s supposed to be — if they have gone well —
LONG: We are all — the globe is in trouble.
LONG: There’s nobody there’s no redoubt left for — I mean, Miss France pageant is a 100 years old, it’s not like they just started.
LONG: So, for 100 years, the French have been doing this, and I’m — this is actually the worst news of the whole show.
GUTFELD: Yes, it is.
LONG: Not the DOJ lists, not murder rates, it’s that France no is no longer officially interested in —
GUTFELD: Yes, but you know what, you know what it does, it does kind of illuminate a truth Kat that we’re all discriminators. We all make decisions based on discriminating the people that we date, the people that we hang out with, we discriminate. The beauty pageant discriminates.
TIMPF: Yes, you know what else discriminates? A nightclub.
TIMPF: Right. Like they have bouncers at the door chosen for their, you know, terrifying, scary appearance to protect against the threat of anybody but a barely legal hot chick with giant boobs and nine-inch heels from walking in with it. That’s an entire industry.
GUTFELD: Yes. And I’m glad you — and it’s not a bad thing, really.
GUTFELD: Heather, do you know that this happened for Mr. France sued in one, Mr. France?
ZUMARRAGA: Sued and won the suit?
GUTFELD: I don’t know I didn’t read it that far, Heather.
ZUMARRAGA: You sound very interested.
GUTFELD: I pulled the Merrick Garland.
ZUMARRAGA: Yes, yes.
GUTFELD: That’s a good — I’m going to just do that from now. Whoops, that’s a Merrick Garland.
ZUMARRAGA: Well, look, nobody’s holding a gun to your head. If you don’t want to audition for a beauty pageant, don’t try out.
GUTFELD: There’s another idea for a show.
TIMPF: Gun to your head.
GUTFELD: Gun to your head beauty pageants.
ZUMARRAGA: Oh, no. Please, no.
GUTFELD: So, they got to walk in and you have a gun, they got to do all the stuff they got to answer the questions. There’s got to be a bikini thing but it’s got to have a gun to their head.
LONG: And the ones who lose get their internal organs looked at.
GUTFELD: This is already better than that “Squid Game.”
LONG: This is so much better than “Shark Tank.”
GUTFELD: It is, it is, it is. Having said that, I don’t think this will work and I’m out. Those people don’t even spend their own money. All right, don’t go away, we’ll be right back.
GUTFELD: Well, as usual, we’re out of time because this is such a great show and what a great panel, even with Kat here. Set your DVR so you never miss an episode. Thanks to Chris Barron, Heather Zumarraga, Rob Long, Kat Timpf, our studio audience. “FOX NEWS @ NIGHT” with evil Shannon Bream is next. I’m Oprah, and I love you, Gutfeld.
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